Inkblot

Last night, I suddenly woke up to the thought, “Oh! I did forget that to-do yesterday.” I checked the time, 2:38 a.m. Neither could I squeeze back inside my blanket, nor did I have the energy to get up. My brain, however, decided to wake up. In no time, I was in front of my computer screen. The work that had caused this midnight guilt trip was done in less than twenty minutes. And then, I didn’t know what to do. So, I watched out my window. It was drizzling—soft, slow, and so soothing to watch. I studied for a while but ended up in daydreams (or maybe night dreams?). I even felt hungry but was too calorie-conscious to gobble anything. I finally dozed off around 4-ish, feeling mildly proud and mostly pitying myself for ruining my sleep cycle… again. It felt oddly satisfying to be the only one awake in the house. The night was quiet, calm, and slightly chilly. The drizzle outside and the glow of my screen created a strange sense of peace. At 3 a.m., everything feels gentler, even your w...

Dear reader, A very Happy Deepawali to you and your family, from mine to yours. May this festival of lights bring you abundant joy, success, good health, wealth, and love. May the Lord shower you with everything your heart truly desires.  Lately, I’ve been overwhelmed by the love you’ve been showing for my writings. Honestly, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that one day I’d write something and someone out there would actually read it!! I started this blog back in June 2024 with a simple intention. Many times, I would scribble my thoughts in my diary or on random scraps of paper… and then lose them later. I wanted to organize those, and more than that, I wanted to make writing a habit; because I always felt lighter after I wrote. I also wanted my words to stay safe, even after I’m gone. So, I created this personal blog to write whenever I felt like it. I didn’t plan to share it at first. But one day, without much thought, I posted the link to my very first write-up on my Whats...

These days I am busy, so I am happy. And if someone asks me, “How are you?” I reply confidently, with a bold and loud, “I’m doing good.” My scale of happiness is set by the amount of work and chaos I carry. More the work, the better my mind. And you know what? I work best under pressure. Of course, after a cry session. Beware if a girl cries and later tightens her ponytail!!! I've been feeling very exhausted lately. Every day feels like a year! But surprisingly, I am totally enjoying it. Sometimes a long day feels irritating, but I do love that feeling of exhaustion which puts me to bed with a sense of calm, that quiet satisfaction of having done so much for the day. Recounting the things I completed makes me close my eyes in peace, smile, worry less, avoid overthinking, and sleep like a baby. Funnily, the next morning I wake up to the same chaos and never-ending to-do lists, and that very chaos drives me for the rest of the day. Let me ask you a question. How do you deal with proc...

I caught a cold last week.  I know, not the coolest first line to start with. But that's the truth, I caught a cold. Cold, followed by headache, viral fever, nerve-wracking pain, a running nose that later turned into a blocked one, a terrible cough, and of course, darker dark circles. My voice has completely shattered into pieces, and I’ve been calculating the number of words before I speak. I’ve been talking in short, broken sentences. Now you might know the extent of my throat infection. And the worst part? The cough that starts the very moment I lay my head on the pillow. The Universe truly knows to ruin my routine just when I start doing well; exercising regularly, keeping up my intermittent fasting , sleeping decently. And right then, the Universe decides to gift me a virus!!!!! Current Life Update: The picture says it all. ( I'm still breathing through  my mouth, by the way. Sleep has long eluded me. )   Never mind, do you know what’s still keeping me sane? The flav...

I am a young woman in my mid-twenties now, and you know what has been on e of my greatest concerns? The wisdom tooth ! Ever since I turned 18, I’ve been eagerly waiting for the wisdom teeth to show up. It became my own funny little birthday ritual. Each year as October rolled around, I’d catch myself checking, almost manifesting them into existence. Maybe it’s because my birthday reminds me of getting older, and in my mind, wisdom teeth were a sign of finally stepping into adulthood. And of course, there’s a story behind this. My mom and dad have never considered me an adult. Even now, they still look at me as their little child. Whenever I raised my voice or argued, they would shut me up with a quirky line:  “You are still a minor, you don’t understand life — because you don’t even have wisdom teeth yet!” I would be startled every time. I longed for the day my wisdom teeth would come, so I could finally prove I was grown up, capable of taking my own decisions. And well, I am happ...

"My eyelids are heavy. It's brully.. aww it's blully... I can't even roll my tongue! Ahh… it's all blurry and dark and grey, I think. I don't know what else I am feeling." "What do you mean by dark or grey? You are in front of your computer screen and that's not even in dark theme. Are you all right?" "Don't you see I'm working on something? How dare you ask me if I've lost my mind!" "Oh Lord, I didn't ask that… let it go. Do you want a cup of coffee?" "Why the heck would you act as if you care for me? And clearly you are not. I have lost count of the times I've said I won't have anything after my eating window is closed." "Intermittent fasting is driving you crazy." "You are jealous of me. Clearly, being known. Damn! I can't even blink. My eyelids are heavy. What if my neck falls apart? This pain is calling death. I totally feel each and every strand of my hair hurti...